Woods, Decisions, Water, Jobs, Snow, & Beds

This week we will answer some unusual questions, brought to you by Kimber, the color purple and the number 13.


1. Have you ever pooped in the woods?
Yes. Poop doesn't care where you are.

2. You are starving. You have not had anything to eat for days. In front of you is poison ivy, a live hissing cockroach, and a rotten stinky piece of some sort of mystery meat to eat. Which would you pick and why?
Poison Ivy. I'm not allergic to it like other people are and I'm sure as hell not going to eat the other two.

3. Bottled or Tap water?
Depends on which tastes better. Bottled water can taste like ass too.

4. Your dream job, what would it be and why?
No job and getting paid. I'm just that kind of lazy.

5. Do you have any snow globes?
No.

6. Do you like your bed? If not, what kind of bed do you want?
I like my bed, I'm just not too sure about the blankets on it. And I'd like to have a headboard on the frame.

HaHa

Add this to the list of DH's "done while drunk" stories =P

Seven Things

Seven Things About Me

1. I have a lot of sock yarn, especially since discovering I can handpaint my own and sell it on Etsy.

2. I talk too much when I get nervous, all the time thinking that I am making a complete ass of myself and yet still unable to stop the insane verbage falling from my mouth at a million miles per hour.

3. I say "Seriously" way too much.

4. I immediately think "where the hell did she learn that?" each and every time my daughter repeats whichever curse word I said last.

5. I have to run far, far away from my family once a week, just so that I can miss them.

6. I drink far too much coffee, which explains alot.

7. I am irrationally terrified by any weather capable of producing tornadoes, even though I live in an area where hurricanes are far more likely.

I don't know if I can come up with 7 more people. Consider yourself tagged. Please let us know 7 things about you.

Tagged:
Azrared (my partner in crime)
Gwendolynfair (recent graduate! yay!)
Truff (just because I gotta see this)
Elazar (my DH)
Samutz (my brother)
Brittain (knitting insanity)
Suga' (because I can)

http://scarletknits.etsy.com

The Third of May

It's now officially my twenty-ninth birthday and I'm here to make a guilty little confession. I'm desperately working to get my final design project finished and I've intentionally replayed the same episode of Project Runway countless times for no other reason than to hear Tim Gunn say "Make it work."

So what funny little things do you do when you find yourself running face first into the brick wall of a deadline?

http://scarletknits.etsy.com

In Theme

Keeping in Friday's theme of things that were not made to go together... Star Trek and Star Wars each have their own run-ins with the Monty Python crew.





Technorati tags: comedy, oddities, silliness, video

Four Twenty

In honor of Four Twenty, Gilbert and Sullivan will now remix that old favorite "Baby Got Back" (because you must be smoking something to come up with stuff this silly).



Technorati tags: comedy, oddities, silliness, video

Quiz Silliness

I'm running away from my homework again. Here's the fruits of my studious avoidance:

You scored as Sirius Black. You are the most loyal friend anyone could ask for because you'd go to any length to ensure their safety and happiness. You're free-spirited and very difficult to confine to a caged life. You love being in the company of those you love and love to show them how much they mean to you. You loathe those who only live for self-gain and show disloyalty. You're a great person but sometimes its needed of you to think more rationally than being quick to jump into things. Hermione Granger 97% Sirius Black 97% Harry Potter 94% Neville Longbottom 91% Luna Lovegood 88% Ron Weasley 84% Severus Snape 84% Bellatrix Lestrange 78% Albus Dumbledore 72% Oliver Wood 69% Draco Malfoy 66% Percy Weasley 63% Lord Voldemort 59% Remus Lupin 50% Harry Potter Character Combatibility Test created with QuizFarm.com

Are You a Slacker Mom? Take the Quiz

Your quiz score makes you: Smarty Pants Mom

Smart parents like you have smart kids. They need plenty of intellectual stimulation and you provide them with all they need, plus lots of love. You know how to help them with algebra homework, and you are superior at kissing boo-boos.

Technorati tags: assignments, silliness

Bo Burnham is going to hell...

... and I guess I'm going with him because I think he's hilarious.

Warning: NSFW, children or pets. Enjoy.



More Bo Burnham on YouTube

... for Harry! England and Saint George!

Spring Break begins today. While classes are not in session, the campus daycare is closed. In just a few short moments I will pick up my keys, drive to the daycare and collect my two older children, ages three years and twenty-three months. Before this endurance test of patience and rationality begins I am begging for everyone to send "calm" vibes my way with the hopes that they will go a long way towards preserving the peace in this house over the next ten days.

Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more,
Or close the wall up with our English dead!
In peace there's nothing so becomes a man
As modest stillness and humility,
But when the blast of war blows in our ears,
Then imitate the action of the tiger:
Stiffen the sinews, summon up the blood,
Disguise fair nature with hard-favored rage;
Then lend the eye a terrible aspect:
Let it pry through the portage of the head
Like the brass cannon; let the brow o'erwhelm it
As fearfully as doth a gallèd rock
O'erhang and jutty his confounded base,
Swilled with the wild and wasteful ocean.
Now set the teeth and stretch the nostril wide,
Hold hard the breath and bend up every spirit
To his full height! On, on, you noble English,
Whose blood is fet from fathers of war-proof,
Fathers that like so many Alexanders
Have in these parts from morn till even fought
And sheathed their swords for lack of argument.
Dishonor not your mothers; now attest
That those whom you called fathers did beget you!
Be copy now to men of grosser blood
And teach them how to war! And you, good yeomen,
Whose limbs were made in England, show us here
The mettle of your pasture. Let us swear
That you are worth your breeding; which I doubt not,
For there is none of you so mean and base
That hath not noble lustre in your eyes.
I see you stand like greyhounds in the slips,
Straining upon the start. The game's afoot!
Follow your spirit; and upon this charge
Cry 'God for Harry! England and Saint George!'

Freaky Friday

In the process of making a comment on someone else's blog I pulled up Wikipedia to look up and make sure that I was citing a bit of internet "law" correctly. Reading the article led me to further "laws" and adages common to the net, and I thought I'd collect my findings here.

Godwin's Law: "As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches one."

Quirk's Exception: intentional invocation of Godwin's Law with the sole intent to end a thread results in Quirk's Exception, rendering the invocation invalid (see the Wikipedia article on Godwin's Law).

Benford's Law of Controversy: "Passion is inversely proportional to the amount of real information available."

Brooks' Law: "Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later."

Dilbert Principle: "The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: management."

Hanlon's Razor: "Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity"

Ockham's Razor: "Explanations should never multiply assumptions without necessity. When two explanations are offered for a phenomenon, the simplest full explanation is preferable."

Stigler's Law of Eponymy: "No scientific discovery, not even Stigler's law, is named after its original discoverer."

... of the Emergency Broadcast System

Had this been an actual emergency, information would have followed.

I am embracing my inner dork and making peace with her.